Posted in Adicia, Jakob DeJonghe, Writing

Lessons learnt from post-publication polishing, Part IV

I didn’t expect to write a Part IV to this series over a year and a half later, but the topic just seemed right to continue.

I had to go through the four manuscripts I’m prepping for print editions, and it was a powerful reminder of how far I’ve come in my development as a writer, even in the last 5–10 years. We should all always endeavour to become better at our craft. If we’re still writing exactly the way we did at earlier stages, and see nothing wrong with that bygone style, something’s very wrong.

As I mentioned in the earlier installments of this series, I definitely would’ve written Little Ragdoll much differently were I only going back from scratch and memory now. It’s much more telly or omniscient, in a number of spots, than my writing has evolved into since.

But I really do feel it ultimately works with the type of story it is, esp. since one of its strongest inspirations is the 19th and early 20th century Five Little Peppers series. It also reads like a 1960s version of A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (which I hadn’t yet read when I wrote this book). Hardly books with a modern narrative style.


At the time I turned my long short story/piece of backstory about Jakob DeJonghe and Rachel Roggenfelder into two full-length novels, I fully intended to query them. I deliberately wrote the first volume as YA, albeit mature upper YA. Hence, the fade to black in the wedding night scene (though they remain technical virgins to avoid creating a potential half-orphan).

Were I writing that book as adult lit that just happens to feature someone who ages from 14–20, I would’ve made it much longer, by at least 50K. I would’ve added a lot more chapters, or made the existing ones much longer and more detailed.

I’d also expand certain wraparound narrative segments into active scenes, just as I would’ve done with many of those kinds of passages in LR. While the estimated 125K is on the short side by my standards, it’s towards the upper limit of traditionally published YA in the modern era. That was as short and sweet as I could make it.

Likewise, the sequel also could’ve been much longer than only 104K. I could’ve easily planned for many more chapters, or made the existing chapters longer. But the focus is on a single young couple and their first true year as husband and wife, not a bunch of competing subplots with my Atlantic City characters.


Things I never thought I’d admit: My ingrained habit of putting two spaces after a period (except for blog posts), when combined with justified text and Baskerville typeface, can create a number of unsightly, disproportionate gaps. I’ll continue typing the way I was taught, but when it comes time to format a manuscript for print, I’ll do a find/change.


I don’t regret at all the post-publication polishing and light revising I did of LR early last year. That book truly needed it, and became stronger as a result. But there are many things about the inherent voice and style I can’t change so much time after writing it, without the entire structure collapsing.

Indie authors can do whatever they want with their own work, but there needs to come a time when one steps back and recognises a book is the strongest, most perfect it’ll ever get. What’s more important, going back again and again to revise or rewrite already-published books, or spending that time on writing new books where you no longer make those mistakes?

I learnt from my mistakes, and recognise them when I see them in older books. It doesn’t mean those previous books are inferior or poorly-written because they have, e.g., a lot of adverbs or some telly spots. It just means I wrote them at an earlier stage of my life.

Posted in Adicia, Aleksey Romanov, Jakob DeJonghe, Rachel Roggenfelder, Writing



The Insecure Writer’s Support Group meets the first Wednesday of each month. Participants share struggles, triumphs, quandaries, and fears. This month’s question is:

What pitfalls would you warn other writers to avoid on their publication journey?

Don’t jump into querying or publication too soon, or declare you’re done editing and revising too soon. I cringe when I see a hit to a post from 2011 or 2012, naïvely declaring I think I’m done editing something that was nowhere near done, or talking about querying the wrong agents or after barely any revising.

Think of it like slowly savouring gourmet chocolate vs. uncouthly gobbling a cheap cookie. You should never rush anything important.

Also, stay true to your own voice and style.

I’m so damn exhausted after preparing four of my five books for print editions! IngramSpark had free title setup during July, to mark their fifth anniversary, but scheduled 26 hours of system maintenance to begin 8:00 PM Central Time on the 31st. I barely made it under the wire!

IS has a very steep learning curve, though I don’t regret going with them over CreateSpace. IS has greater reach, being taken more seriously, and a higher maximum page count. But damn, was that a lot of hard work!

I chose not to put up Swan because it needs a revamped cover and light tweaking.

I’m really grateful my father provided so much help with my cover templates.

I’ve yet to check proofs, but after all the time I spent with these files, I doubt I left any typos or other little mistakes. I went back through my two books about Jakob and Rachel, and only had to do minor tweaking (mostly rooting out overused words and unnecessary pluperfect, esp. in the first book). I also specified Jakob’s father was buried in a copper coffin, to explain how he wasn’t in an unrecognisable state of decay after almost five years.

There were unfortunate errors with my revamped cover for LR, so I had to get a third cover. My revamped cover remains for the e-book, but it didn’t have enough pixels for good rescaling. It pulled pixels from other things, creating a muddied, fuzzy look. The artist also no longer has either the physical artwork or a digital copy.

I went with 6×9 trim for everything but my alternative history, which is 7×10. At 6×9, the page count was just too high for IS parameters. I figured 7×10 was a workable compromise. It’s not a standard size, but not wildly unheard-of either. As someone who reads many saga-length books, I’m cognizant of how page size translates to comfortable, long-term readability and ease of holding.

As I mentioned in several previous posts, once I’ve earned enough from my alternative history, I’ll use some of the money to make donations to the Hemophilia Federation of America and National Hemophilia Foundation, in memory of Aleksey. I didn’t write that book for myself.

When I break even with Little Ragdoll, I’ll use some of that money for a donation to The Bowery mission, which appears several times in the book. I most need to make back this $200:

I won Camp NaNo with a mix of my alternative history, my minor edits on the other books, blog posts, and A Dream Deferred. My goal was only 20K, and I knew I wouldn’t have a giant wordcount due to the timing.

Oh, and my trackpad quit working. At this point, my 11-year-old backup computer is in better shape than this one! My father gave me an external mouse he no longer needs. In addition to that, I enabled touch-clicking.

I’m still interested in doing guest posts to promote my alternative history!

Posted in 1940s, Atlantic City books, Couples, Historical fiction, Jakob DeJonghe, Rachel Roggenfelder

Very exciting news!


With gratitude to Hashem, my long-delayed second volume about young couple Jakob DeJonghe and Rachel Roggenfelder is scheduled for release on 4 June, Saturday. It should’ve released at least a year ago, but what’s done is done. I let myself get stuck in an unhealthy holding pattern because I was so humiliated and upset over my complete lack of sales.

I like to have release dates which are important to my characters (birthdays, anniversaries, historical events, etc.), and luckily, I found a really good one for this. 4 June 1946 is the date Jakob and Rachel reunite after 13 months apart. That day was Erev Shavuot in 1946, though Shavuot is 11–13 June this year. We’re still in the thick of counting the Omer, which is my favoritest mitzvah. Counting the Omer is so, so special to me, particularly since I let myself fall away from it in 2005 and didn’t come back for several years. I was so depressed over being a family of one and feeling so ignored by the local Jewish community. I felt like Dante waking up in the Wood of Error, no idea how he got there or lost the way so badly.

I’m extremely superstitious about auspicious and inauspicious dates (by my personal reference of what constitutes a lucky vs. unlucky date). For example, in hindsight, I think I had so many problems healing my third lobe piercings because I got them done on the anniversary of the Nazi invasion of Hungary. And while my navel seems to be healing pretty nicely at the 6-month mark, I never would’ve gotten it done on 24 November had I known that was Freddie Mercury’s Jahrzeit (death anniversary). As I’ve said, I’m a lowercase skeptic, not a rigid uppercase Skeptic.


Jakob thinks coming to America and reuniting with his beautiful Rachel is a dream come true, but he soon realizes America’s streets aren’t lined with gold and that people who don’t quite fit in aren’t always treated very nicely. As he’s struggling to adjust to life in America, Rachel struggles with insecurities over how her husband is little more than a stranger. And just when it seems her heart is no longer in turmoil, a new struggle arises—finding a midwife in a country where hospital birth has become the norm. Her search for a midwife isn’t helped by the conformist young wives’ social club she’s been roped into joining, full of women who already look down on her for keeping her surname, wanting to go to college, and enjoying sex.


By my standards, it’s really short (all of 104K), and a much quieter, more intimate storyline than my usual wont. There’s no huge ensemble cast or grand, epic, sweeping story arc. Several of my Atlantic City characters briefly appear or are mentioned, but this isn’t their story. Even the Brandts are secondary characters, not leading characters in their own right. This is a story about one young couple, not all of their friends and acquaintances.

There are a number of sex scenes, many of which I featured here when the Horny Hump Day bloghop was still running. There’s also a strong promotion of natural childbirth and evidence-based prenatal care (which naturally flows from Jakob and Rachel’s Dutch values), so this isn’t the book for you if you cheerlead for hospital birth and only hospital birth, lots of drugs, and never questioning the doctor about anything. I always promote natural childbirth and midwifery in my books, in a way which naturally flows with the pre-existing storylines and characters. It’s just how things are done in most of my characters’ native cultures.


I do have plans for further volumes about Jakob and Rachel in the Fifties and Sixties, with storylines about their going to college, their quest to give their daughter a real bat mitzvah before that was the norm, and the rubella epidemic of 1964. In the concluding volume in 1981, they’ll finally discover what happened to Jaap’s baby sister Emilia when she disappeared in 1940.

Posted in 1940s, Couples, Jakob DeJonghe, Rachel Roggenfelder, Writing

Horny Hump Day—Jakob and Rachel

My What’s Up Wednesday post is here.

Warning:  Not safe for work or appropriate for those under 18!

Welcome back to Horny Hump Day, a weekly hop where writers share three erotic sentences of a book or WIP. My snippet this week immediately follows last week’s, as 19-year-old Lt. Jakob DeJonghe kisses his dream girl, Rachel Roggenfelder, for the first time. She’s a fair bit more experienced than he is, and has to take over to teach him.


After awhile, he became emboldened enough to try imitating her, while still letting her lead.  His only active role was running his hands through her hair and along her face.  He was burning with desire to touch a lot more than just her hair and face, but he knew respectable people never went from nothing to everything overnight.

Posted in 1940s, Couples, Jakob DeJonghe, Rachel Roggenfelder, Writing

Horny Hump Day—Jakob and Rachel

My What’s Up Wednesday post is here and my Write Path post is here.

Warning:  Not safe for work or appropriate for those under 18!

Welcome back to Horny Hump Day, a weekly hop where writers share three erotic sentences of a book or WIP. I’ve been away for awhile, to focus on the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge, and to focus on my release of And Jakob Flew the Fiend Away on May ninth.

This scene is from May 1945, when 19-year-old Jakob and Rachel kiss for the first time. Jakob has only kissed one other girl before, a friend of his who begged him for a kiss the night before they were deported. Rachel has had several previous boyfriends, and knows much more than he does about technique. He’s happy to let his dream girl teach him.


That night, as they were counting stars, Jakob slipped his violently shaking arm around her and pulled her towards him, then wrapped his other arm around her, leaned down to her height, and kissed her. Rachel seemed to sense that he didn’t really know what he was doing, and he gratefully let her take over and teach him. He let his mouth become soft, pliant, and passive against hers as she demonstrated the techniques she liked.


Amazon page

Goodreads page