The gender-industrial complex, Part XII (What is to be done?)

Warning: Any hateful, threatening, abusive comments will be deleted and the commenters blacklisted. If you can’t bear a critical look at the media narrative you’ve absorbed, you’ve got a lot to learn about maturity and the importance of listening to other voices.

What exactly can we do to fight back against this tidal wave which arose within the last five years, when there are so few questioning, skeptical, critical voices in the media and anyone who dares not go along with it is denounced as some horrible bigot?

1. Deliver your message respectfully, cite valid sources, and bring up science and history. You’ll notice I haven’t once, over this series, used words like tranny, she-male, he-she, or laydeeface. I’m not about disrespecting other people, even when they use hateful language like “cis scum” and “TERF.” Never fight fire with fire. When people see you’re not just some rube with a computer ranting away, but someone delivering a message articulately, they’ll be more likely to listen and pay attention.

2. Stop using ridiculous language the transactivists have made up in the last few years. It just validates their cult-like narrative to call yourself “cisgender” or talk about “transmisogyny,” when no one outside of a very small group actually uses such words. For that matter, we should also call a double mastectomy what it really is, not use the euphemism “top surgery.”

woman adult

3. Defend yourself when you’re baselessly accused of “transphobia.” Actual transphobia would be bullying someone (real bullying, not making them use a gender-neutral bathroom), refusing to hire someone or rent them an apartment based only on being trans, using mocking slur words, or firing someone who starts transitioning.

4. Leave skeptical comments on news stories and YouTube videos, whether they’re nationwide or just local. The more people who publicly question this trend, the more encouraged others will be to break their silence and start speaking out too.

5. Let kids go back to just being kids! I grew up in a world where boys and girls played with all sorts of toys, and a girl playing with trucks and dressing in blue or a boy playing with dolls and growing long hair wasn’t seen as a reason to alert parents and send the kid off to a gender therapist. Left alone, at least 80% of children eventually grow out of dysphoria, and many who persist in gender-atypicality turn out gay.

6. If you’re part of the LGB community (which I’m not), try to steer organizations and news outlets dominated by the T back onto their original track. Perhaps you can ask why your campus gay-straight alliance has almost nothing but trans-themed activities, or write a letter to PFLAG asking where all the support for GLB youth went.

men in dresses

7. If your child announces s/he’s the opposite sex, or wants to be the opposite sex, start a healthy dialogue by asking why s/he wants to change sex, and what s/he thinks being the opposite sex is all about. Children notoriously have an immature view of the world, minus years of life experience and cognitive development. For this reason, we don’t let children vote, drive, get married, live independently, work, or have mortgages either. Many times, they hear an adult word or concept and mistakenly apply their childish understanding of the world to it, like thinking sex must mean French kissing.

8. Don’t discount legitimate dysphoria among teens and twentysomethings. Many girls don’t have a very healthy, loving attitude towards their bodies because the popular media doesn’t exactly positively celebrate things like menstruation and giving birth, and there’s the very real fear of rape and sexual harassment simply for having a female body. A sensitive young man can also experience dysphoria and a confused attitude towards his sexuality, such as is on display in these three letters to Scarleteen:

“I worry that because I’m a man, I am going to sexually abuse someone”

“Is intercourse a violence or a violation?”

“Am I less of a man for waiting?”

9. If you’re gender-nonconforming like I am, celebrate that and serve as a positive role model to children and young people. I might, for example, tell a little boy I love his toy fire truck and say I loved playing with toy cars and trucks when I was his age. If he expresses surprise a girl would play with trucks, I’d tell him all toys are for both boys and girls, even if many people think only boys are allowed to play with trucks.

10. Question these stories being reported so uncritically by the media. Once you start digging below the surface and questioning things, you’ll be blown away by what you’ll discover.

toys meme

11. Stop rigidly stereotyping children, dammit! Give them all sorts of toys and costumes, stop making them play in different teams or stand in different lines, let them all participate in the same activities, don’t make a big deal out of it if Johnny has painted nails or Jane sports a buzz cut. So many of these alleged transkids are a direct result of adults refusing to let them play with certain toys or like certain colors.

13. Don’t let your minor child make irreversible, adult medical decisions, and find a legit (preferably older) psychiatrist instead of some SJW gender therapist!

14. Get acquainted with the gender-critical blogosphere! Some of the informative blogs I’ve learnt from include:

Transgender Reality: What Trans People Are Really Saying Online
Stop Trans Chauvinism (a blog of reblogs)
Peak Trans Moment
4th Wave Now
The dirt from Dirt
Truth About Transition
Redress Alert
GenderCritical Reddit
Third Way Trans
Rejecting the Gender Cult
TERF Is a Slur
The Truth About Autogynephilia
Transgender Trend: Parents Questioning the Trans Narrative


5 thoughts on “The gender-industrial complex, Part XII (What is to be done?)

  1. That link and question about intercourse being violent is just sad to me. That poor guy has been driven to anxiety by bad ideas about sex. It’s not just transgender that is moving toward dangerous thinking but men having sex too. Scary when you read about it.

    @Chrys, OMG I have and it’s kind of outrageous the hate people use that term in.


  2. Having read the entire series, I agreed with most of it but have some questions. I hope they are phrased respectfully enough.

    1. Your posts accuse trans people of promoting gender stereotypes. However, many trans people (Tyler Ford, to give just one example) feel strongly opposed to gender stereotypes, or identify as LGB, or otherwise reject these norms. How do you respond to them?

    2. If terminology wasn’t an issue, would you still have a problem with adults choosing to change their names and appearances? So, for instance, if someone takes testosterone but is okay with being called female, would that alleviate your concerns?

    3. (A two-part question.) In addition to being skeptical about young people transitioning, you are also very dismissive of adult trans people (such as Caitlyn Jenner). However, you state that you believe some people have genuine gender dysphoria which is helped by transitioning. So, question part 1: What would prove to you that a person fell into the latter category? Part 2: Is it appropriate to make those judgment calls about people you don’t know well?

    Your blog series focuses a lot on kids and young people even though children who transition are incredibly rare, and medical interventions are even rarer. For instance, the UK’s only NHS child gender clinic did a 3-year study on hormone blockers which concluded in 2015. 32 kids were given blockers and only 8 of those decided to start actual HRT. It’s hardly as though this is the new standard for childrearing.

    I strongly agree that the internet is not a healthy place for young people to get information about trans issues, but it’s also a bad way for non-trans people to get information. It comes across as disingenuous to criticize people for forming their worldview based on blog sites, when you’ve just concluded a 12-piece blog series by recommending 16 of them.


    • I definitely agree there are trans people who don’t get into stereotypes at all, and who cite overwhelming dysphoria as their reason for transitioning. I just discovered an awesome YouTuber named Yorick (a transman), who’s really been tearing apart a lot of the craziness in current transactivist politics. He says if he were a gender therapist, he’d tell someone to get out of his office if that person claimed something like a love of pink and unicorns or sports and short hair as “evidence” of being trans. However, in the stories of so-called transkids, and with a lot of the teens and twentysomethings, stereotyped colors, clothes, play behavior, toys, etc., are what’s overwhelmingly cited, not lifelong discomfort with one’s body and having a strange feeling something wasn’t right.

      I don’t have a problem with adults who choose to change their names, since it’s just common courtesy to use the name a person wants. It’s the same as using a woman’s actual surname instead of addressing mail to her with her husband’s surname when she never changed her name, and has told that person repeatedly that she kept her birth surname.

      I actually began following a lot of trans-identified YouTubers before hitting peak trans, to try to educate myself, and pretty much all of them (except the one trans YouTuber whose videos I still regularly watch) are not only very young, but also cite stereotypes in their “How I Knew I Was Trans” videos. Many of the people discussed in news stories posted on trans-skeptical blogs also cite stereotypes, and even seem to be working from the same script, instead of having more unique experiences and reasoning. I agree with Yorick when he says all these transtrenders are making it hard to take legit trans people like himself seriously.

      The number of children presenting to gender therapists and clinics has exploded over the last five years or so, with a 930% increase alone at just one London clinic. That’s completely out of proportion. I’d encourage you to read the 4thWaveNow blog, which has many scholarly essays about the recent phenomenon of so-called trans kids. She focuses on children, teens, and twentysomethings too, because that’s where almost all of the media focus has been, and because these are people whose brains haven’t fully matured. I wasn’t allowed to take matters into my own hands regarding my religious identity till I was eighteen, though I’d passionately wanted to live a Jewish life for a very long time. As emotionally painful as it was to wait that long, I think my parents made the right choice in insisting I wait till I was a legal adult. If you really want something, and are absolutely sure of it, you’ll be able to wait until you’re of age and able to make decisions on your own.

      Obviously, not everything online is a terrible resource. It’s all about learning how to vet one’s sources. There are so many great articles discussed at the various blogs I linked to. While a couple of the bloggers do come across really strongly, the information they present is still very good. I have nothing against a young person getting information at a scholarly, serious web source. It’s places like Tumblr I’m specifically referring to.


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